So-nerotically Signing IN: Girls + Me = awkward moments
I’m joining you tonight to share with however wants to listen how awkward and unconfortable I get when it comes to girls, dating, sex and, relationships. I will take you through a journy of actual events. I plan to share my most embarssing moments starting from way back when to persent. Here’s a top ten list to get the ball rolling.
10- The first boyfriend I had I had to ask him if i could kiss him… He broke up with me the next day.
9- The first kiss I had that wasn’t one of my cousins was on the swings in elementry school. 10 minutes later my Mom (Who was a teacher at the school) found out about it and out put him on the wall for the rest of the recess (I think it was because he was black)
8 - I use to dry hump my cabage patch dolls and kiss then like they were my lovers
7-I actually thought my BF’s boner was the remote controll in his pocket.
6- The first time I stuck my hands down a girls pants she had a pad on and didn’t tell me.
5- My first girlfriend had french tipped acrylic nails. One time when we had sex we both got really into it and…she cut me…on the inside. We never had sex again.
4- I once had a GF who could only get turned on if we talked about me being pregent or roll playing that we had just put our three kids to bed.
3- one time I had sex with a girl. Once the clothes were off…everything STOPPED!
2- One time I dated straight girl who told me her sexuallity was like a circle…She’s still straight and still believes it.
1- I always wanted a life size barbie so she could my love slave.
Well there you have it folks a little peice of me E.N. the So-Neurotically can’t help but scare girls away by my intense awkwardness.
So-Neurotically siging OUT.
